Just Like Daddy...

“Okay buddy, I got a surprise for ya!”

“What sort of surprise, Daddy!?”

“Well, today is a particularly special day… you’re big enough that you no longer need a car seat, AAAAAND you’re old enough to sit in the front seat!”

“I am?”

“Yes sir! So, here’s the deal, I have in my hand two things: a can of Murrays Pomade, just for you, and a handful of temporary tattoos! How’s about you run and grab that red and black plaid shirt that looks like Daddy’s and I’ll fix you up with a killer ‘doo’! Then, we’ll slap on an armful of ‘tattoos,’ just like Daddy’s, and you and me will take a spin in the ’48 Chevy!”

“Really?!!”

“Really!”

“Okay, okay, wait………………………………………. Kay! Look Daddy, my shirt I’m ready!”

“Good job buddy! Alright, here’s the deal, you take the pomade and grabe a health handful like this…. A big’o blob of it works best; more is better!”

“A ‘blob’? Daddy you’re crazy!”

“That’s what Mommy says, but never mind that… Kay, ready?”

“Yup!”

“Now, you have to ruuuuuuub it into the top, the sides, and all around.”

“It smells like you, Daddy!”

“Yes sir! Alight, now, the comb! This here, bud, this is YOUR comb when we’re all done, okay?”

“Thanks Daddy!”

“You betcha! Okay… a few runs through like this, two or three down each side, and lift the front like this! Perfect! How’s that?”

“I look like you!!!!”

“Yes you do buddy! It’s perfect! Okay, don’t touch it okay bud?”

“Kay!”

“Alright, now for the ‘ink’! Let me grab a washcloth real quick…”

“These are cool, daddy! They look sorta like yours!”

“… Hey, you’re right! A little bit huh? Okay, lets put the eagle……. Here! Just hold on a minute, gotta let the warm water stick it good. Okay, lets put the two swallows on the backs of each hand! …….. Prefect! What’da think so far?”

“Punk rock!”

“’Punk rock’? Where’d you learn that?”

“From you!”

“Oh. Well, hey pal, don’t mimic EVERYTHING I say kay bud?”

“I know, Daddy. Mommy calls some things ‘Daddy words’!”

“She does?”

“Ya. Like ‘shit’ and ‘sunuvabitch’.”

“okay, okay, bud… I get it!! You’re too much!”

“Looks good, daddy!”

“Yes sir, I think you’re right! Okay, you’re all tattooed, you got your hair all dappered-up, I think we’re ready to roll whatda think?”

“Yup!”

“Okay, run to the restroom and I’ll meet ya in the garage in 5 minutes! We’ll go cruisin’!”

“Okay Daddy!!!”